Karaoke originated in Japan and it is a Japanese word meaning empty orchestra.
“Kara” comes from “karappo” meaning empty, and “oke” is the abbreviation of “okesutura,” or orchestra. I arrived in Japan in 1981, in plenty of time to participate in many hours of obligatory karaoke business entertainment during my twenty years working there.

Since karaoke is a Japanese tradition that we now enjoy here in the USA, it would be nice if we could pronounce it.

Japanese words are actually straightforward and simple to pronounce. If you know some Spanish, then you are familiar with the vowels and you should be able to sound out any Japanese word that you see written in roman letters. You should also be able to spell any Japanese name that you hear without having to have it spelled for you.

how-to-pronounce-karaoke

There are many things that make Japanese a difficult language but pronunciation is not one of them.

Linda Performing Karaoke in Japan During a Company Retreat (before karaoke machines)

Please enjoy your festive singing this holiday season. May you be safe, healthy and happy.

I have not been in a mens locker room but traveling with an otherwise all male management team might be similar to what it is like. Their idea of entertainment was a stream of jokes taken at someone else’s expense.

Good wit is attractive to women and important in male hierarchical play.

One reason I fell in love with my husband was that I loved his way with words. I admire Ray’s humor because he is able to be very funny without resorting to being gross, vulgar or hurtful. I consider that evidence of his intelligence.

Apparently, I am not alone in being attracted to a man’s wit.

Whenever you look at on-line dating sites, you will see many references regarding good sense of humor (GSOH). But that doesn’t mean that men and women are looking for the same thing.

Women want a man who is a humor “generator,” while men seek a humor “appreciator.” (Eric Bressler, a psychologist at McMaster University in Canada)*

Geoffrey Miller theorizes that men learned to use humor and wit to attract a mate and perhaps to outsmart other men.*

Men and Women use humor differently

Jonny Goldstein replied to my April 8th post saying, “‘the arch enemy’ statement was definitely written twit in cheek!” Jonny, I was using your words to make my point about male competitive spirit, not to express hurt feelings. I very much appreciated the reminder that I wanted to write this post about gender differences and humor. Many thanks also to Tim who left an inspirational comment here on April 30th about verbal jousting.

Anything said when comparing men and women usually includes sweeping generalizations and certainly there are individual, cultural and demographic differences. But looking at some expert opinions, it would be worth considering:

“Men taunt other men with clever nicknames and insults. That isn’t something that women do. They don’t tend to play practical jokes, or engage in humor that humiliates or puts somebody down.” (John Morreal, a professor of religion at William and Mary College in Williamsburg, Virginia, who has studied humor for 25 years.)*

“For women the primary goal of conversation is intimacy and, for men, the goal is positive self-presentation. Women’s humor supports a goal of greater intimacy by being supportive and healing, while mens humor reinforces performance goals of competition, the establishment of hierarchical relationships and self-aggrandizement.” (from Mary Crawford’s book, Talking Difference on Gender and Language)

Many men can feel threatened by a woman with a sharp wit. However, men who do appreciate their female partner’s humor are usually more secure, mature and educated than average. (Don Nilsen, a linguistics professor and expert on humor)* I would add the same holds true for male appreciation of intelligent, successful women.

*Thanks to William Lawson who sourced the experts for an article in Psychology Today.

There are fewer successful female stand-up comics

I know a lot of very funny female writers of books, columns, blogs etc and there are some great comedians but in general the number of men investing their time in being humorous, particularly stand-up is simply larger.

I think it could be explained by the two common goals of being funny: to joust with other men and to attract women.

Christopher Hitchens explains why he thinks women aren’t funny in a Vanity Fair article. I am not saying I agree with all his points but I thought it was worth including.

Jokes about the difference between men and women

No discussion about the gender differences in humor would be complete without at least one humorous reference to stereotypical differences between men and women. There are so many, here is one cute list and a sample:

Nicknames:
If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose.
If Mike, Charlie, Bob and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy

Generational Differences in Humor

Do male teenagers use particularly aggressive humor? I should ask my friend, Vanessa Van Petten, author of Teens Today but I did pick up this amusing recent experiment.

As reported by the BBC, Sam Shuster observed hundreds of people while unicycling around Newcastle upon Tyne. He discovered that men made more jokes at him than women. He said the majority of male jokers were aggressive and mocking, while most women at most teased him with a smile. He found teenage boys to be particularly aggressive in their humor.

Is the Way Men and Women Use Humor Changing?

Political correctness and the evolution of the place in society of women and minorities may have affected how we use humor. As women become integrated into previously male domains, is the gender related use of humor changing? What have you noticed in your life?

I went through a phase of not owning a TV for three years before moving to Japan in 1981.

In Japan I began watching TV to study Japanese. The dramas were pretty easy to follow even with minimal understanding of the language. I liked to use American movies broadcast in Japanese because I already knew the story so I could absorb the language almost subconsciously. I found TV a great right-brained way to study.

Broadcasting TV subtitles are not mandatory for television sets directed at Japanese consumers but I managed to find one. NHK was the leader but gradually the commercial stations produced more and more shows with closed caption sub-titles. This is a terrific way to study Japanese. Watching the story unfold, listening and reading is a great right brain left brain medley. I still have a collection of VHS tapes (I know, ancient technology) I made in Japan. Over the years, people would tell me my Japanese sounded “natural” as opposed to “textbook” which I attribute to the influence of TV.

I also watched Japanese TV to follow consumer taste. The style in Japan for commercial broadcast TV is to present a series of 12 shows that trap you in the story. While on the mission of checking out a hit show to better understand my customers, I would certainly get hooked from time to time. A show title that translated to “I Owe Her Money” was one of my favorites. It was about a man who falls in love with a professional money lender.

I found this method of studying language so useful that I used American movie DVD’s to study French and then Italian when I was working for Club Med and Barilla (supported by Berlitz lessons). The great thing about DVD’s is I can watch in French/Italian with English titles and then in French/Italian with French/Italian subtitles. The work days in Japan are very long but it is possible to squeeze in 30 minutes here and there. I set up an exer-cycle in front of the TV for morning exercise before dashing to the office.

These days I like watching TV in Spanish, which is very convenient in LA. I especially like HBO Latina because it broadcasts Spanish closed caption. Unfortunately it isn’t broadcast in Hawaii. I guess I am the only person spending time in Hawaii that wants to see it.

Why do you watch TV?